So tonight I told my husband, I need to blog about something brutally honest; what do you think I should blog about? In typical male fashion his first response was "anal sex". I said ok, then he says "no blog about ball hair"...yes I married a man's man! So I told him, ok, I will blog about the "ugly truth" about sex.
The first reference that popped into my head was bumping uglies; this isn't just a funny little reference to sex but it really does describe the act of sex. I mean lets face it, for the most part, our privates aren't exactly pretty. There's hair that grows in places we don't want, lots of wrinkles that don't just show with age, odd smells, funky fluids and for most men, terrain they need a map to travel. The honest truth is that unless you are watching a very well directed, edited, and air brushed movie; sex really isn't all that pretty. So why do we do it? Cause it feels good! Because it brings us closer to the person/s we love. Because it can allow a level of intimacy with our partner that occurs only when we have extra time, privacy, energy, and drive.
Our sex lives change just as we change. When we get more busy, we get less busy if you know what I mean. The more we have to do, the less we "do it". There comes a time in our lives when having a sex life is an extravagant and "guilty pleasure". So if the thought of the "ugliness" of sex is hard for you to, ahem...swallow; I recommend closing your eyes and imagining you are in one of those really well edited and directed movies; and a little candlelight never hurt....or a strategically placed mirror.
I'm totally loving your blog so far! Some guys not only need a road map, but a GPS that gives precise directions!
ReplyDeleteI can't say I agree with this at all - my partner and I love and appreciate each other's bodies in their entirety. Our bodies are REAL, and that's beautiful. I don't subscribe to bodies as a fashion accessory.
ReplyDeleteRachel - I think that a lot of people are scarred to talk about the things they think about and that is part of the purpose of this blog; I agree. some men need help...but I bet some women do too!
ReplyDeleteScarredBellyButton - first I love your screenname! Second, as I was saying above I believe alot of people are afraid to talk about what they think about. That being said, I agree with you that the human body is beautiful, the blog above was a little more direct that there are parts that are not so pretty all the time. More importantly the above blog is about the fact that people choose to have sex for variuos reasons, and as we get older and mature more those reasons tend to change...that being said, some people do find the "act of sex" difficult because they can't get over the sometimes ugliness of the parts involved; so I included an idea to help with that.
I like to imagine that every time I'm intimate with my husband an outsider would think it is beautiful like a perfectly directed and edited sceen in a movie, but I know it isn't; and that isn't the point. Sex as a form of intimacy and expression of love is more beautiful than the actual action that is occuring (for the most part!), and gives a level of closeness for couples that is sometimes difficult to come across in other ways.