OK WARNING NOW! THIS POST IS ABOUT FEMALE ANATOMY - IF THIS MAY OFFEND YOU OR UPSET YOU DO NOT READ FURTHER....YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.
So, I had a beautiful baby girl 8 months ago. She was abit on the large side, 8lbs 11.4oz and she came quickly, I only pushed for about 25minutes. I did have a small 2nd degree tear, no big deal. Prior to becoming pregnant I had to have surgery on my...whoowhoo to remove a septum that could have presented me with many problems during pregnancy and/or delivery so, I already had some scar tissue in there.
Since my baby's birth I've felt, different, down there. which I am sure is normal, but I've continued to have pain with sex...so I saw my Dr today.. Turns out i have a spot of scar tissue, not from the delivery, that is causing the pain along with other issues that worsened it (lack of estrogen etc). So i have to do some things to try to help it and if they don't work i may require another surgery...not looking forward to that!
Anyway, this situation got me thinking. Every woman's anatomy is different, and apparently one woman's anatomy can change. Do we all think our whoowhoos are "not right" or "not normal". Is there a such thing as a normal "whoowhoo". Of course, I've "learned" in my schooling that there is. But the differences are relatively amazing and why do women always seem to think they are the not normal one? Why are we so concerned about how our whoowhoos look? I mean really, is anyone actually looking at it? I know I'm not posing in any playboy anytime in the near or distant future. But I still worry about the aesthetics of my privates. Where did this whoowhoo insecurity come from? Are women born with it, or is it something that is taught to us in some way as we grow up - from society, the media? Are men insecure about their whoowhoodillies? I mean really, I'm married, my husband loves me the way I am and obviously doesn't have issues with the whoohoo...so why do I? Why do so many women have problems with their whoohoos?
Whoowhoodillie...I love that word! As far as problems with the whoowhoo, I don't know where it comes from or if every female has that issue. I think it's a generalized insecurity because it's such an intimate area? I think guys are different with the whoowhoo issue because lets face it, they are just happy to be putting their whoowhoodillie in a whoowhoo and could care less what it looks like! However, I think a lot of guys have whoowhoodillie insecurity when it comes to size. They have size issues, females have look issues. Ugh!
ReplyDeleteI think that the majority of girls and women simply do not know what vulvas look like. Here, if vulvas are shown in R-rated publications, they legally must be photoshopped to show only a “neat slit” ie to look like the vulva of a pre-pubescent girl. Not only is that completely creepy, it sets up false expectations for both men and women. Women think they’re abnormal if they have pubic hair, or visible labia minora (perfectly NORMAL post puberty), or asymmetrical labia, or a prominent clitoris, or anything else that’s actually perfectly normal.
ReplyDeleteWomen and girls are also given a subtle message that their genitals are “bad”. Just look at all the products on the market, and the messages they send about what are actually NORMAL vulvas – hair removal, douches, deodorants. Hair grows on the vulvas of adult women. Healthy vaginas don’t stink, nor are they dirty or gross or ugly. That’s just reality. It probably also doesn’t help that people are uncomfortable with using the correct names for body parts, choosing instead to infantilize them.
Most people know what penises look like, and most people have seen them many times during their lives. Vulvas are considerably less visible. Penises are presented as being majestic and proud.
I suspect there’s some penis insecurity going on these days due to the advent of products like Viagra – mean are told that they’re impotent and need this drug. They’re told that they need to have a large penis in order to attract a sexual partner, and guess what? There’s expensive surgery for that. “Sexual Dysfunction” is a big industry.
So many products make money off people’s insecurities.
Personally I’m not the least bit concerned about the appearance of my vulva, or my partner’s. It’s all good.
So why DO you have issues with the appearance of your vulva?
K77 - I don't have issues with the appearance of my vulva, my vagina, my labia, etc. The situation of continued pain many months after delivering my baby and my visit to the Dr got me thinking about it. I remember very clearly a friend in college who was extremely concerned about the way labia appeared. My surgeries were NOT cosmetic but corrective secondary to a birth defect (they are called muellarian anomalies). I am a nurse and soon to be a nurse practitioner; I am more than aware of the normalality of different appearing female genitalia; in addition; I frequently discuss the social norm of making women feel like they are dirty, ugly or smell when in fact they are not and it is all normal and natural and caution against the use of so called "feminine hygiene products" which will actually cause problems for many women.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your take on things and shared thoughts.